Fenty Beauty by Rihanna

There’s something about Slick Woods. Not everybody “gets” the particular brand of bald-headed, gap-toothed, full-lipped beauty that has catapulted the Minneapolis native from former homelessness to modeling for Kanye West, Mercedes Benz and Rihanna, but you gotta admit, there’s something about her. Maybe she’s born with it, maybe it’s ...

Wait; wrong beauty brand. After all, Woods is one of the faces of Fenty Beauty, handpicked by Rihanna as one of her campaign beauties. And in keeping with her brand-ambassador duties, Woods recently recorded a tutorial demonstrating how she gets her “Fenty face” on.

And that’s where the hilarity ensues. “Ooh! Shit ... a little hydration nation!” she exclaims as she preps her skin with Fenty’s Pro Filt’r Instant Retouch Primer, her trademark acrylics no impediment to getting her glow up. For the next four minutes, Woods’ streetwise insouciance is on full display as she gives pretty-legit beauty tips for bald heads, beauty blenders and breakouts, expertly mixing two shades of Pro Filt’r Foundation (360 and 390) and advising on how to achieve a perfect finish:

I don’t know about all my other bald girls, but when I use foundation I try not to use a lot on my forehead, because I feel like it makes you look ashy. Keep it light up there—turn the egg around if you have to, ya know what I’m sayin’? ... You know, a little spot treatment, because your girl’s been breakin’ out lately ... don’t act like you ain’t hear me.

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Then, just to prove the power of a subtle contour, Woods leans into her nonconforming style to demonstrate how she uses Fenty’s Matchstix in Truffle: “Get that nice little chisel to your boy ... that’s how I start looking like somebody’s boyfriend, you know what I’m talkin’ ’bout?”

But it’s all girlie glee when Woods gets to her favorite part: applying Killawatt Freestyle Highlighter in Ginger Binge/Moscow Mule, the former shade of which she prefers to use more as a blush: “This [pointing to Ginger Binge], at my house, there’s a hole in it.”

In fact, pink is Woods’ favorite color to use on her face, ironically because, as a bald girl, she feels it gives her a “tough vibe.” In fact, she doubles down on her rosy glow with a Matchstix Shimmer Skinstick in Yacht Life, which she popped into the inner corners of her eyes.

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But because, in Woods’ world, too much highlighter is never enough, she then broke out the famed Trophy Wife, “the topic of discussion,” as she puts it. But Woods doesn’t let the glittery-gold shade get her too excited—and advises that you don’t, either: “So, bam. You see all of this is going on right here, and you’re gonna get excited, but chill.”

And Woods’ approach is definitely chill, just adding that “bling blow” to her upper cheekbones ... and her eyelids ... and above her brow ... and the tip of her nose ... “She’s living!”

But just to keep that shine under control, she uses a bit of Invisimatte Blotting Powder to bring it down a bit, before finishing her look with the universally flattering Gloss Bomb.

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“You see my shit?” she says, clearly pleased with her Fenty face.

It’s a convincing tutorial—and an entertaining one. Aside from wanting a makeup bag full of Fenty, we now want to hang out with Slick Woods because aside from being the “it” girl of the moment, she seems like a lot of fun.

Plus, who doesn’t love a tutorial that treats putting on concealer the way Emeril Lagasse throws on some extra spice?

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“Bam, gettin’ sexier!”